April 23, 2018

If Momma Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy

I hear way too many moms complaining about their role as maid, chef, and chauffeur to their children.  When you ask a mom how they are the answer is always busy. Newsflash, everyone is busy regardless if they work, stay-at-home, have children or don’t. Busy isn’t an answer.

When did it become virtuous to be subservient to our kid’s schedules? Ladies, let’s take the time to care for ourselves.

A happy Momma is a good Momma.

Find yourself sacrificing your health and happiness to your hectic schedule? It might be time to make adjustments to your schedule. Making adjustments doesn’t have to be all or nothing. Your kids can scale back on activities. You can get someone else to take the kids to practice so you can take a yoga class. Carpool with other parents. There are many creative ways to carve out time for your health and wellbeing while still ensuring your kids get to enjoy their activities.

My main point in writing this blog is to encourage women to take care of their mind and body without feeling guilty. Stress is a leading cause of illness. Let’s be proactive in reducing stress. Exercise and preparing healthy food require time. In my opinion, time well spent because nothing is more important than our health.

It sounds a bit cliche but the safety information on an airplane sums it up perfectly. If you are traveling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your oxygen mask first, and then assist the other person. Let’s apply this helpful advice to our everyday lives. Exercise, healthful eating, and stress reduction are examples of applying our oxygen mask first. A healthy momma is better able to carry out her parenting obligations.

This applies to every woman. Having a career is demanding and finding the time to care for yourself can be challenging. Your health is worth prioritizing. If we’re sick all the time or tired we’re not the best employees. Everyone benefits when we are healthy.

Let me be clear I’m not suggesting your kids stop all of their activities. What I am suggesting is that you seriously evaluate your family life in regards to your children’s activities and schedules. Prioritize what is important to you. You being the key, everyone has different likes and dislikes.

I’ll bet some women prefer a hectic lifestyle running kids around after school. If that’s the case, don’t complain about it. If you’re happy, project that. It occurred to me that maybe women are afraid to answer the question of how are you with great. Maybe they’re afraid others will find them boastful. It’s not boastful to tell everyone that things are going well. Women who are confident and happy want the same for others.

Making decisions is difficult. Making decisions, concerning your kids, is especially tough. Keep checking in with yourself from time to time. You don’t need to think non-stop about the decision that’s counterproductive. It’s important to give yourself breaks. Make a decision when you feel completely good about it. You’ve heard it 100 times before, GO WITH YOUR GUT, it’s always right. Apply this strategy to every decision in life and see how perfectly everything falls into place.

Please know that my intention is for everyone to live happier full lives. Being a parent is difficult enough without feeling attacked. When asked how you are I want everyone’s answer to be great thank you, how are you? Not busy, tired, overwhelmed and tapped out. That is no way to live life.

I find comfort in knowing that I can change my mind and make mistakes, even when it comes to the most important job we’ll ever have: parenting.

Please be soft on yourself and know that when you’re happy your kids are happy. Happiness is all we should strive for once we’re truly happy everything else will fall into place.

We are lucky to have these problems; these are First World problems. In some parts of the world, every day is about survival finding food and water. Not which activities should my child participate in and how can I find the time to make a healthy dinner, exercise and fit in a little TV. Being free to make choices is a privilege. Our children are lucky to have parents that care enough to contemplate parenting. Many children cannot say the same.

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