Up until my early 20’s, I’d always felt less than in many ways. Not as smart, not as pretty, and not as skinny. My constant negative self-talk consumed many years of my life.
Even as I lost weight my attitude about myself remained unchanged. That was until Greek week my third year of college. Greek week was a competition between sororities and fraternities. There were different activities each day, like a blood drive, talent show, etc.
I happened to be involved in the scavenger hunt team that year. I remember running to 7-Eleven, eating a hot dog and running back to the final stop on campus. Real quick, you do realize you are getting weight loss advice from a girl boasting of running a few miles after eating a 7-Eleven hot dog. It’s cool; I promise this is going somewhere. Anyhow it might seem like a small victory to some, but to me it was huge. I ran so fast that my team won. Better yet I didn’t throw up the hot dog.
It was the first time I gave my body credit. I was used to thinking and speaking negatively about my body. And here it ran the distance with ease, after downing a hot dog no less.
Appreciating my body was a change for sure. I had lost 40 pounds and up until this point, I had yet to appreciate it. I finally gave my body the credit it deserved. What I was onto was a new way of thinking about my body. It wasn’t about what it looked like on the outside but how I felt on the inside.
I was exercising to challenge myself mentally and physically, not just to get “skinny.” Around this time I started using a heart rate monitor while working out. It was rewarding to see my heart rate increase while I was working out. I began thinking about how my blood was pumping throughout my body and how beneficial that was for my body. It motivated me to push myself.
Hindsight is 20/20. I cannot believe I was able to lose weight with all the crap I was telling myself. Now I know, one shouldn’t compare themselves to anyone. We are all different and it’s all good. Being jealous of pretty skinny girls only hurts you. Becuase someone else is skinny doesn’t make you fat and vice versa. Click here to read Jealousy Sucks for more on that subject.